Now when it comes to musicals, everyone has a favorite. I, for one, have seen Wicked at least 4 times. Some people prefer classics while others only like contemporary. The story is important to me, at least, but many a classic musical has gotten away with a weak book because it had some catchy songs. But there are some songs that are so overdone, overrated, or just plain bad. And here is where I get snarky.
(Warning: when I get depressed, I get irrationally angry. That's what this post is. Also, there is some language.)
Okay, I'm just going to start at the top (bottom) of my list. My most hated. The song that makes me want to rip my ears off and kill someone with them. (Look, I feel strongly about things.) That song is "Tomorrow." Yes, from Annie. First of all, fuck Annie. As a child of the 80s, I was primed to be one of those little girls obsessed with this musical, but I WASN'T. (For the record, I wanted to be Punky Brewster as a wee child and became obsessed with Grease. Not that the two are related.) I have seen the movie, and my junior year of high school, it was our spring musical. But you couldn't pay me to watch that shit again. I mean, I hate kids. I don't want to watch a bunch of kids singing. I just don't. And "Tomorrow" is the most saccharine sweet piece of crap ever. Unfortunately, *everyone* loves to sing it, so you hear it in cabaret shows and concerts. No. Don't do that, lovely Tony award winning actress. You are not a precocious ten year old. You're a grown ass woman.
*Ahem*
So yes, I have thoughts. Sticking with classics, this is a show I have never seen, but the songs are so ingrained in popular culture that I know enough to hate them. I could possibly give this one a chance - at least the movie because of the cast - but I haven't yet. And it is The Sound of Music. In a church New Year's Eve show, I played one of the Von Trap kids and had to sing the "Do Re Mi" song. (I don't even know if that's the name.) But I hated it, and I was maybe ten. I just - no. Same with "My Favorite Things." And that song is covered to hell and back. And WHY is it a Christmas song? The only thing that I can think of to make it remotely Christmasy is that it mentions packages. But packages do not a Christmas song make!
Then we come to a musical that I love. I know many of the songs by heart. But one song is just particularly bad. I was late to the Rent party - my best friend would listen to the OBC recording over and over in the early 2000s, so I got to be familiar with it. Sadly, I saw the movie first when it came out. Then I saw it on Broadway in 2005, and Maureen was a BLONDE. I had problems with that. Anyway. Now that I'm older, I see the story differently. After watching Rent: (Not So) Live! I wanted to be like, "Get a job!" Benny was the villain, but he was trying to help. Ya know, it's easy to just live off your art if you're wealthy, but broke people gotta eat. Anyway... Roger spends his whole life trying to write that one song. And really? "Your Eyes" is the best he could come up with? That's the song you skip when listening to the recording. "One Song Glory" is way better.
And now we come to the Andrew Lloyd Webber portion of the program. Yes he's done a lot, blah, blah, blah, but he's overrated. Since Cats is gonna be a movie (why after 30+ years? I don't know), we have to talk about "Memory" - quite possibly the most overdone musical number. Who hasn't sung "Memory" in the past 30+ years? Cats is kind of the gateway drug to theatre. Even if you don't go to the theatre, you've seen Cats. The literature nerd in me loves that it's based on T.S. Eliot poems, which I've read. I mean, don't get me wrong. Cats was the first show I ever saw as a kid (I made my parents take me in sixth grade), and I'm totally going to see it when it comes back to Nashville this fall. But we really never need to hear "Memory" ever again.
And don't even get me started on Phantom of the Opera. I saw it on Broadway earlier this year because I had never seen it, and I don't know how it's been going on for 30+ years. Also, I watched it through the eyes of a feminist in 2019; it was not a love story. It was two different men trying to control her. Sigh.
When I love something, I really love it. When I don't... well, you see.
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